Wednesday, April 25, 2007

May his soul rest in shit!

Disclaimer: I am writing this as Pranesh Kumar Chaudhary. If some people get hurt in the process, they are most welcome.

All those who comment as anonymous will be doomed as the hero of this post is, i.e., their souls will rest in shit.

Ok this post is dedicated to all the naysayers and protestors by the Halla band. So lets’ hit it, come on!

Pointblank - this is the character, the hero, the freak who made me restless enough to blog on the last day of ‘another’ semester. For the lesser illuminated as I was till a few days back, this is the blog signature of one of the worst hypocrites KGP has ever seen. The freak (I am taking this liberty because magnanimous that he is, he must have got accustomed with being called names) publishes all the shit that is possible by his narrow mind in his publication and then gets up and has the guts to review others. The freak takes huge pride in the dramatics achievements and the unruly and cowardly behavior of his mates in the same breath. The freak believes he is blessed enough to see what the mere mortals can’t and those on the other side of the fence created by him can’t even see what is visible to everyone. The freak was the first one to bring out a finger from his nose and poke at the poltu and God culture of KGP and seems too stricken himself by the same ( Sincere plea: If you, Mr. Freak, are reading this please poke that finger of yours now in the socket of your UPS to spare the world). The freak is of the school of thought that believes we should be true enough to ourselves and perform ‘only’ dramatics in an Institute with technology as its core competence.

Now this Mr. Freak of ours started a newspaper presumably because the elites (title conferred by Intel Inside) running the media (Hoof!) were swayed by the western culture (proclaimed in the letter to editor section of their issue by another esteemed freak). Hey man, get a life! You publish pathetic poems with the government money and your fellows decry even the bhaat by others. The freak then selects a jumbo team of 50 in 5 selections and YES, Mr. Freak I have concrete info on how people were called up and begged to join the team. All this to publish one issue per semester. Naah, he had bigger ambitions, or let me put it in a better way – he had this whim of bada hoke kuch karenge (We’ll discuss this after a while). Coming back to his Hindi parody of everything in general and something in particular, he copies the very concept and then his fellows say that the bar graphs, invented in the field of Mathematics (Something fishy, did anyone say Department for field?) by them only got copied. The whole publication worked like the mouthpiece of his hall and Illu and Rangoli pics of winning teams were overlooked in favor of his deserving hall’s pics.

There is so much more that I can write but we have more burning topics like feticide, err, Festicide. Yes, my sincere plea to all the KGPians reading this is to develop festicides which when applied to this freak will cure his inferiority complex. It is the very Junta which puts the core team members and heads on a pedestal and not the other way wherein the selected ones go around begging for attention as this freak did. He wanted us all to believe that organizing a fest is easy. Well, it might be but not for a suave copycat like our freak. He once again copied, this time, one of the main attractions and success of the fests and presented the most haphazard version of a fest. Mr. Intel Nowhere or Mr. Pentium 0, read this carefully if you do read it ever – the fest was a failure on all accounts and least because of slothfulness of Junta. The effort put in was pathetic, the arrangements higgledy-piggledy (Vinter, happy?) and the faces of the members and heads during the fest piteous. I won’t go into what all I have heard but Mr. Freak, the fact that the participants were called up to increase the participation from, hold your breath, 0 and one of the main sponsors abused all of your team in public wasn’t the status message of Manoj. Taking snaps from angles which show that sizeable crowd did turn out and boasting the outstation participation to be more than other fests in their formative years isn’t enough. For your information, Ankur had about four times the number of outstation participants in its one and only attempt. I must make it clear here that I have nothing against the fest but my freak needs festicides.

Now the small matter of his hall commitments and the happenings inside one’s hall. Let me tell you all with again Vinter and Manoj as witnesses that its’ not a rumor but yes, the inmates :) of your hall who were eye witnesses to all this were the source of the 'shaking of all kinds of parts of anatomy'.

I know that Mr. Freak, magnanimous that he is, and another magnanimous personality, who people proclaim was the one smacked by the shaking, have reached a point of no return. So, another and the last plea of this post: please ensure that they read this post and see the review of themselves by me. There is always this chance of our Mr. freak poking his fingers in you-know-where after reading this.

Hence, I sincerely believe that Mr. Freak won’t find place even in hell or shit.

28 comments:

ronsin said...

baap re itna gussa!!! details kabhi aur poochhenge...
waise tum to ekdum pata hi nahi lagne diye ki kiske baare mien likhe ho...

Unknown said...

Good one chap... itna hatred!!!
sorry yaar... 'd hav loved to meet u sm day...

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

:)

Garam Samosa said...

@Rohan and Arunabh
Thanks for commenting...n for Rohan :))
@Vivek
I wud also luv 2 meet u some day...n abt justiications, u jus don't hv any..

Unknown said...

huha aggresion!!!
well i know u wont change :)

S. said...

God Level hai be...

Keep it up...the aggression i mean..

Bade ho jaao..baad mein baat karte hain.. :)

Anonymous said...

Grow up........(and I know u hate me for saying this!)

Unknown said...

i know u r aggressive by nature...but...why that much !!

Baffling said...

Just a little advice...
If you ever meet the freak in person, do not shake his hand, you never know where it might have been.
;-) :D

Aur kaash tum thoda padh liye hote, ghaasi ki izzat bach jaati, ek suputr toh honahar nikalta

Unknown said...

watch out for sparks!
sale tu mere blog pe comment nahin karega
how do u expec us to comment on urs
anyway!
piss

Garam Samosa said...

@Anurag n Kisalay
Bhai log kewal aggression pe comment..i guess u ppl agree wid most of wot i hv written too nyways, thanks 4 reading my post
@Chinmaya
hv got used 2 such comments 4m u now

Garam Samosa said...

@Baffling
mera exam khatm hone ke baad time lagaye hain isme :)
@Marathe n Baffling
Thanx 4 commenting..i ll also surely comment on ur blogs :P

Garam Samosa said...

@Intel Inside
Jarur

Vinayak said...

Awesome post. Hats off. I agree with all the points you made.

It's just bad that it does give people chance to ignore all the serious stuff it talks about simply by saying something as immature as "bade ho jaao" or "grow up" etc etc...


PS - Thanks for keeping up with your promise of mentioning my name in each post :D ...

Anonymous said...

Vow..
man you do have quite a temper and worse still, an impressive literary skill to convert your thoughts into equivalent words..
neways well crafted, though cant help feel pity for the guy it was intended to throw light on..
will get the details of this bustup..
think i can trace my thoughts at writing something on the same lines for you lolz :P
muhahah...

Garam Samosa said...

@seraphic (aka Varun Jain)
thanx 4 the appreciation..n ll sure let u kno abt Mr. Freak..n sure expect a comment 4m me on ur blog very soon.. :)

Garam Samosa said...

@those who remove/delete their comments
if u don't hv the guts in 1st place, then better keep shut..

Garam Samosa said...

@vinter
:) i ll sure keep on mentioning ur name in every post...n thanx 4 feeling the theme as well as the layout of this post rather than missing them all and writing testimonials as few others have done..those few believe they can get on wid everything i point by pointing my aggressiveness n surprisingly, all of them r 4m the same school of thought :)...they all seem 2 b too grown up 4 their boots n other specifics...thanx 4 being insaner n agreeing...

Praveen Mishra said...

achcha prayas tha :)

Sunny said...

Forget about the protagonist of this post... and forget about the other detractors. I'm glad you're aggressive... you'll need that to drive a newspaper. But more important than aggression is the ability to channelize it well... make sure you work on that :-)

PS: Talking of aggression, I still have that sms you sent on the day Schols Ave was banned saved in my cell!

Garam Samosa said...

@Sunny
I will surely try my best to maintain the standards you and other seniors have set. n would definitely love to read that sms again as i don't remember the exact words. :)

Anonymous said...

dost tum vaade karke bhool jaate ho...

And please blog man... kya boring life hai yahan.
How's VKaTractor going? This is my only scrap book, baaki sab banned hai :(

Garam Samosa said...

@Baffling
plzz yaad dila dijiye main kaun sa vaada bhul gaya..waise achcha laga jaan kar ki u r awaiting my next post..jald hi aapki sewa me prastut hoga mera naya kamaal..[:P]

Anonymous said...

the template is better dan before. kum se kum sab likha huwa sahi se nazar aa raha hai. pehle :warm tha.. ab :cool hai... :)

Garam Samosa said...

:)
thanks for commenting abt the new template...

Anonymous said...

waise gussa saaf nazar aa raha hai.. han.. gussa wazib bhi hai...

Garam Samosa said...

suprised 2 say the least..
i really admire ur tenacity n courage...
keep visiting my blog..[:)]